Dear Brentford,This forum is a very special place, for very... special people. We're usually so starved of entertainment;bickering about CPZs and gargantuan flats, we should be grateful when a bona fide mental patient takes the timeand effort to regale us with his apocalyptic musings. I implore you to use your loaves for a moment. Like tesco's bakery tiger baguette, we're perpetually on the brink of going stale. As Confucius said, "...a strictly enforced regime of cleanliness, inevitably lead to Godly yeast infection."Let us break bread with the lunatics. Or naan or whatever this spastic eats when he isn't fasting. Exclude them from mealtimes and the loonies may find the motivation to effect a coup d'asylum. Moreover, if you ban all the fruitcakes then professional provocateurs such as myself will have to come out ofretirement, just to keep the blood flowing, and other miscellaneous bodily fluids.At least you know where you stand with Iraftiki; somewhere between bowing to pray and kneeling for a beheading. My next spoof was to involve a Romanian animal rights group and a trio of escaped pet anacondas; nowhere would be safe to stand for too long!A prank involving ebola was in the works but got shelved when I realised that Itfartski is probably planning something comparable; and a lot more... theatrical. All the more reason to let him stay here and share what's on his mind; Mi5 don't need to hack his emails - he won't shut up!Choose wisely! Yours sincerely, /\ (~( ) ) /\_/\ ( _---_ (@ @) ~ ( \ / & /|/-----\|\ VEZB " " " "
Thomas Lynch ● 4196d