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Disgraceful behaviour on 237 bus this morning

I was absolutely disgusted this morning to witness abuse from a man with 2 small children directed at my 71 year old mother and then have this abuse turned onto myself for sticking up for her.I was waiting for the 237 bus as I was making my way into work. Whilst I was waiting a man in his 30s with 2 small children arrived amongst several other people as the bus took a good 10 minutes to arrive. My mother than joined me at the bus stop as she was going to do her weekly shopping. The bus then arrived and stopped in front of my mother who got on the bus first (bear in mind she is a pensioner and the bus was already pretty crowded therefore she would struggle to get a seat).The man who was waiting next to me then said "There's a queue you f****** *****" and I turned to him and said "That is my mother you're speaking to". He then went into a tirade of verbal abuse as we got onto the bus (which was now crowded full of people) to which I refused to resort to his level, only pointing out that this is how he shows respect to his elders. He even offered for me to get off the bus and fight him! This was highly embarrassing and insulting, not only showing a poor example to his children but also a lack of respect for women, elders and his fellow passengers. What has happened to these values in our community?It is so disappointing to find that there are grown men like this who have no shame in behaving in such a disgraceful manner and I only hope that other people on this board have not had to witness similar experiences to this!

Norman Hayes ● 4722d24 Comments

Not being rude Neil both you and your children are a lot younger and therefore should be able to walk. Also remember that the majority of those OAP's have contributed and worked all their lives and are not getting anything that they have not earned. An awful lot of them are still paying Income Tax on Private Pensions that they have paid for.

Dawn Hardy ● 4715d

Trouble was she jumped the queue.

Neil Chippendale ● 4716d

I'm so glad this subject has been brought up, queuing at bus stops.  I live abroad but on my all too infrequent visits to visit my son in Brentford I've been made very aware of the lack of courtesy at bus stops.  Back in the day when I lived & worked in London I used buses on a daily basis & everyone formed a queue when waiting, in fact I can remember the bus stop signs had, 'queue this side' written on them. Imagine my surprise when I noticed everyone just barging their way to the door even those who had just strolled up to the bus stop! Eventually I had to adopt the attitude of, 'if you can't beat them, join them' but it goes against the grain.  If people formed orderly queues & got onto the bus in that order, people like Norman & his mum wouldn't have to be subjected to such abuse.  Oh for the good old days when we had conductors on buses.

Jane Masri ● 4716d

I come back to the UK once as year and I find that every "OAP" expects an entitlement even if they are fit and healthy. If I was taking my children to school and the bus arrived very late I would be annoyed if I was bumped of a bus by a very healthily looking OAP.

Neil Chippendale ● 4716d

Of course you don't, what's amusing is that if you are 68 years old and are asked for your seat by someone younger.

Dawn Hardy ● 4716d

Actually, I have in recent years started to experience the 'problem' that people offer me a 'disabled and elderly' seat when I am only just hitting retirement age. I accept gracefully when this happens but it doesn't leave me feeling too good. Do I really look that old/tired?!

Anne England ● 4717d

Dear AllIn London we have so many nationalities who live or work here, as I've travelled countries I have noticed the differences in queuing (don't worry this is not my only pastime), in most European Countries queuing is the same as the UK was many years ago, some respect it and a minority don't.  The best though being the Japanese for queuing and I don't like to say the worse just say they are different and its the Russians who race you to the front, like you are in an unspoken race.  When at the airport I almost felt myself taking up the challenge for the race, however I gracefully let them win!As for the man who was rude on the bus in front of his children and other passengers, no need for this and take a look at yourself in a mirror!

Debbie Richmond ● 4718d

"It seems only the English queue"I think that's probably quite true and it is something that we probably don't like too much but it is a small but significant part of what makes our fair minded society.I do get cheesed off when people just surge for the bus and push and shove and I'm afraid to say it is almost always people from abroad irrespective of race or colour, it just seems to be normal to them to push and shove.I've noticed that older people from commonwealth countries do queue and are always polite in the same way.I do agree it is high time TfL started to put up polite notices reminding people of how things are done here. One can not really blame people for this if they don't know and are not informed of the protocol of manners.

Raymond Havelock ● 4718d

Norman i am very sorry your Mum was treated this way i hope she is Ok, i find it astonishing the Driver did not kick this Guy off..But i find some Bus Drivers are like this. On buses there is a Area for the Disabled and there is a rule set up by Boris Johnson that if a Disabled person wants to get on the bus and there is a pram ion the disabled area the driver is suppose to tell the Passenger to fold the pram up but i have found that only 1 driver this year has one that 4 me when ive tried to get on a bus with my mobility scooter. The other week i got to the bus stop and we were the first there when a lady with a pram turned up, a bus came along and i couldn't get on because there was a pram and shopping trolley in the Disabled area, the 2nd bus came and the disabled area was empty but the woman with the pram came past me to get on the Bus, so i pulled in front off her and told her to stop being Rude (she was Polish) and i got on. But your right about no 1 lines up no more, as soon as a bus pulls up its everyone 4 themselves especially with Kids. Its time TFL start doing something about all this, but don't try emailing a complaint as they never reply.

Simon Anderson ● 4719d

I stand corrected Keith.

Dawn Hardy ● 4719d

Nationalities Dawn.

Keith Iddon ● 4719d

There's good and bad in all races!!!

Dawn Hardy ● 4719d

Yes that does not seem any better an attitude that some of the people at the bus stop this morning!Personally I would like to see TfL do a bit more on the queueing issue. posters and signs on bus stops and shelters.They used to do this constantly on various areas of civility and etiquette  on public transport. But now nothing and many people newer to the UK do not have these sorts of simple polite and fair habits.My German friend finds it insane that we queue for a bus and she barges her way on every time.Despite the tongue lashing she gets from her husband and the rest of us she justifies it simply by saying 'Oh it is only you English who are stupid enough to queue"  Trouble is there are not too many English at the bus stop.  Which is why there needs to be a bit of education provided.

Michael Brandt ● 4719d

Well Xanthe, maybe if you think "teenagers are a damn more polite and thoughtful than I was at their age" you might be able to learn some lessons from them, rather than posting your hateful rants on here. "Battle axes", "Peasants" etc. Suggesting that people should use the C word in a "non-confrontation sentence" is appalling and you should be ashamed, it is one of the most offensive words anyone can use and immediately becomes confrontational. As you say "Some people just need to be told." Consider yourself told!

Christopher Boucher ● 4719d

No-one queues these days at places like bus stops -it more like guess the stop point of the bus - but you can't hark back to old days when battle axes built (and looked) like Les Dawson in drag elbowed their way to the front of the queue cos they 'was old'.  A lot of new-comers to this country these days don't understand the concept of queuing - they always have to be at the front to get anything; look at the way the peasants from third world countries get in on the act when food aid is distributed - aid agencies fault in the first place not to make these peasants form an orderly queue before they get any food/freebies given to them.  Some people just need to be told.  Like the time I was at the bus stop near McD's and as the bus pulled up and a lot of people moseying about waiting to get on said bus, one young asian chap walked in front of the bus shelter and stopped right in front of the door until I reminded him we were ALL waiting to get on the bus - and - to his credit - did wait until all those at the bus stop had boarded bus.  Or the time some african male stepped right in front of me just before the bus doors opened and I had to point out to him did he want to get ON the bus or be UNDER it?  As I told him, he was lucky not to be UNDER the bus leaping in front of people like he did and making them jump.  Some people just need to be told.  And educated in the ways of this country.Oh, and if someone's f****** and whatnot just use the C word in a non-confrontation sentence and watch them back-pedal.          Personally, I find teenagers a damn more polite and thoughtful than I was at their age.

Xanthe West ● 4719d

Whilst I have every sympathy with you and your mother, I have to say that queuing and boarding busses these days drives me nuts and makes me want to scream.  Like Chris Boucher I was brought up in a time when children were expected to stand if adults were on the bus and seats were at a premium.  I was also taught to stand in a queue i.e. one behind another, something no one seems to do today.  I am frequently the first person at a bus stop but I am invariably the last person on the bus and like your mother, I am also a pensioner but I never ever jump the queue nor do I ever expect a seat.  Good manners like queuing appears to be a thing of the past.

Bernadette Paul ● 4720d

Many years ago if you took the bus with a pushchair then you had to fold it up, unfortunately the pushchairs are more like prams. Walking never seems to come into the equation for young mums any more.

Dawn Hardy ● 4720d

It's too many pushchairs during rush hour that go just one or two stops.There are also a lot of mentally challenged people using the buses who have nowhere to go and have to make lots of journeys to get treated. So much for care in the community.This happens so often that most people simply switch off. Drivers can do very little. They can't leave their cabs with a risk of attack and calling for the police ends up with the bus being seriously delayed making everyone late and the drivers get penalised for doing so.It's why I've started driving again. Had enough of it.

Michael Brandt ● 4720d

Keith totally agree - I am always amazed at the number of people that wait for a bus on Brentford High Street to go one stop round the cormer to Half Acre - and none of them ever seem to pay a real fare

Chris Broadbent ● 4721d

Big mistake making it free for under 16 imo.Half price yes,but free just encourages them to get on the bus to go even 1 stop.Usually in a pack and often causing noise and disturbance.In an age when we are trying to encourage youngsters to take more exercise it is daft to make it free.

Keith Iddon ● 4721d

Many, many years ago, when I was still but a kid, I was taught by my parents to always give up my seat on the bus for those who needed it more than me. A habit which stays with me to this day. Unfortunately bus travel in London is now horrendous, people who use a seat to put their shopping on (not that they've paid for two seats) and refusing to move it no matter how full the bus is, more kids buggies than you can shake a stick at and school kids who think that because they get free travel have a divine right to sit wherever they wish regardless of other people. Oh, I was also taught to take my litter home if I couldn't find a bin. Now, contrary to what some people on here may think,I am not a 24/7 grumpy old man. I am all for progress but as it is said, "manners maketh the man" where have they gone?

Christopher Boucher ● 4721d

Sorry missed off the rest.Sorry to hear of your Mothers (and your) experience today.  Elderly are so vulnerable on buses and the queues are now very strange with everyone 'bundling on' rather than waiting patiently.  To make you smile, a few years ago I regularly travelled by bus and one elderly lady (who probably used her age to get to the front of the bus queue, and quite right too) used to ‘leap’ onto the bus.  Once aboard she took a quick look around to see if there was a seat, and if not, she swooned.  In those days it several people always rushed to give her their seat.  At her destination she leapt off and scurried very quickly along the road.

Sarah Felstead ● 4721d

I do so hate it when somebody puts *'s in.  I get the first word but what does the second start with, give me a clue

Sarah Felstead ● 4721d

The driver should have thrown him off.

Dawn Hardy ● 4721d